love climax

once a boy liked me and he made a frndship with me.i didn't knew about anythin that he loves me.after sometime he proposed me but i said him no because at that time of my life i didn't believe in love. he didn't argued wiyh me an said me 'atleast we can be frnds now'. so i said yes to him.so we became frnds thereafter. but after sometime of our friendship he was not able to control his feelings and started liking and loving me more than he loved me before. he expressed his feelings to me and said me that he cannot control himself from loving me..But at that time i take it as a joke and thought that ,he is just feeling an attraction and affection towards me ,so he is thinking that he loves me.i asked some of my frnds that should i say him yes or not.i consulted with them to make a decision because i was also liking to talk and spent time with him.but my frnds said no ,i should not say him yes.they also gave me some reasons that''he is not qualified to u,he is not ur type,he is just playing with u and will throw u out frm his life after sometime etc.'' t that time they were very close frnd of mine,so i thought that they are showing the right path to me. like this with some more reasons they did a brain wash of me.my mental situation was very confused and i thought that they are perfectly right.But the boy every time tried to explain me and prove to me that he truely loves me.so after this there is a holidy gap of durga puja.
After holiday the first day of school-
i and a frnd of mine named moumita were going to school.as i said she did a brain wash of me by saying all those things that i mentioned before. and i was totally confused about everything.The whole day i didn't talked with him .But after tiffin time he came to wish me 'shubho bijoya' ,but my head was bursting with fire and angryness after hearing moumita,but i calmly replied him,he didn't went frm there after wishing me,he was standind there to talk with me ,but i calmly said him that i don't want to talk with him at that time.but he was not going frm there and was standing there to talk with me .but then also i said him four or five times that i don't want to talk with him.but then also by standing there he was creating a scene there and i was feeling embrassed,i requested him many times to go frm there but he was not going,so my angryness in my heart burst and i insulted him badly. he went back to his seat and was crying.i was really feeling bad for him,at that time the teacher entered in the class and i was unable to do anything.after that he didn't come to school for many days. after that day both of my frnds who did a brainwash of me broke the frndship with me and never talked to again.

              While this time i was feeling something soft in my heart  for himand i didn't know what was that. i suddenly started missing him.i was thinking about  him whole day.i wanted to talk with me but was helpless.
    At this phase i was very lonely,in school no one was intrested in talking or frndship with me.but by god's grace a girl named manisha and i became frnds.i told her all my problems.Then after hearing me and my feelings she explained and proved to me thai i really love the boy.at first i didn't believe her and thought that she is also trying to play with my emotions.but then i myself realised thati really really love him.
                  So i decided to say sorry to him, explain him the situation and patch up with him.

one day i took his phone no. from a frnd and called him,at first he cut the line and was not ready to talk with him.then my frnd manisha called him and tried to make him understand .then he said that he will talk to me.
i called him but he was very angry frm me and said me to say sorry to him between the whole class because i insulted him between the whole class.but i said him that it is not possible for me.so he said tht its ok,but he don't want me back in his life because he have a new girlfriend ,he loves her a lot and she also loves her a lot.he said me that at present also he loves me but he cannot betray her,because at the time i insulted him he was lonely for a long time but after that she came to his life,she gave a new light to his life and teached him to leave newly.so i requested that ,allthis happened for a miss understanding,lets patch up and just be atleast''hi'' , ''hello'' frnds but he did not agree.,because the way i insulted him he can never forget ,but he still love me.
I also loved him a looooooooooooooottttttttttttttttttttttt but cannot do anything.I desparately want him and his love back in my life ,but as the situation is it is not possible .
Many times i tried and decided to forget him and start a new life,but it is not possible by me.
i reallllyyyyyyyyy looooooovvvvvvvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeeeeeeee him a looooooooootttttttttt and desparately want him back in my life.
many times i tried to make him understand but he is not trying to understand the situation and just pointing out the ''insult incident''.
plsssss frnds hlp me and give me some solution. i cannot live without him.plsss hlp me.