Signs of a bad and failing relationship
You might be feeling a little down because you feel your spouse doesn't have time for you. You might be depressed that things were not the way how it was meant to be. You might be into a weak and falling relationship. Below are some symptoms of a falling relationship.
All healthy relationships have a common denominator and that is love. Love is manifested through emotions and feelings for each other by being kind and more concerned about the needs and desires of his/her partner than his/her own. Briefly, love is putting the other person before oneself, treating him/her as s/he would want to be treated.
Due to this behavior from each other, the two are constantly attracted to each other and enjoy being with each other more than with someone else and have a lot in common including the future. They both are constantly on each other's mind.
They are loyal to each other and compromise with each other if there is any disagreement or controversial issue between them. They share a common future. If the factor of love begins to lag in a marriage/relationship, then it is an obvious sign that the marriage/relationship is beginning to fail and will soon grind to a halt if not attended well in time.
Before the final breakup of a marriage or a relationship, the cracks in it begin to show up. Some of the warning signs of a marriage in jeopardy or a bad relationship are as follows:
- Loss of intimacy: This is one of the first signs which crop up in a marriage. The desire for intimacy between a husband and a wife is lost or dramatically reduced. The spouse is no longer physically attracted to the other partner. They tend to avoid such moments of togetherness as they did when they got married.
- Communication breakdown between the partners: Communication between the partners gradually winds down over time because there is no longer anything in common to talk about and share between the two. They may attend parties or other social engagements and even do some work jointly at home but the communication gap between the two is observed to have widened they may communicate only in monosyllables or short sentences. Spending their days under one roof with little or no meaningful conversation is a stark evidence of a failing marriage.
- Last to get the important information: Due to lack of love, there is strained relationship between the partners and so the communication between them breaks down; the partner who is eager to share important information about personal problems or achievements or concerning his/her career, prefers to share it with his/her friends or relatives rather than do so with his/her partner. This is because of disregard of one’s partner by the other. S/he may later share it with her/him or the partner gets the information second hand from relatives or common friends.
- Growing criticism: When the relationship/marriage was new, any mistake one partner did was overlooked by the other because of the bond of love between the two. But when a marriage/relationship begins to fail, the love factor no longer exists between the two so the faults of each partner become hurtful in the eyes of one another; due to lack of tolerance, they are always keen on hurling criticisms on each other and begin to get intolerable to each other. It becomes a daily affair of every action being carefully observed and taken into account. There seems to be no longer any chance of doing anything right in the eyes of each other.
- Repeated Arguments: When a marriage/relationship begins to fail, the days of overlooking each others' faults are over. Criticism for one another brings plenty of arguments about different matters; they just seem to go round and round about the same issue with no resolution in sight and bring in more such issues to argue about.
- The blame game: Each one blames the other or his/her relatives or friends for the strained marriage/relationship. They may use loud, harsh words to convey their message to one another. None of the two 'steps down' to accommodate love and bring reconciliation in their relationship.
- Distractions from the problems: Both the partners face a new situation in their lives, that of a strained relationship. Therefore, instead of together facing the situation head on and resolving it, each one avoids solving the problem. They do not realize that this is the beginning of a failing marriage/relationship.
- Fear of one's partner: The love between two partners in a relationship/marriage removes all shadows of fear. When the marriage/relationship turns sour, the partners begin to fear the presence and the comments/criticisms of each other. Fear is generally brought about by the dominating partner who makes all efforts to intimidate the other constantly, inciting fear in him/her. The relationship/marriage is on the brink of a breakup unless a timely action is taken to remove the erratic dominance.